A few years ago I started hearing a lot of buzz about this new fad, One Little Word. If you’re new to the concept (like I was), it basically takes the place of New Year’s Resolutions.
Instead of giving yourself a list of things you won’t do in the new year, focus on what you will do.
And narrow it down to one little word.
I tried it for the first time last year, and I LOVED it. It transformed my thinking..and my year. It’s so much easier to be motivated by a word, rather than a bunch of restrictions you put on yourself.
This year, my one little word came to me easily. I didn’t even have to think about it. It’s a word that’s been resonating with me alot over the last few months…especially with the challenges of adding a second child to our crew and toddlerhood.
My one little word: sow.
You know the word: to scatter seed for the purpose of growth.
Motherhood is a hard job. And we don’t make it any easier on ourselves.
Comparison and social media can be like poison to a mama’s heart and plant seeds of discontentment and unrealistic expectations when it comes to our children.
I’m guilty of it.
I compare myself to other moms, compare my kids to other children and get caught up in expecting my kids to be what I think society wants them to be: well-behaved, well-mannered, kind, little humans.
And those are all traits that I definitely want my kids to have. Along with patience, love, faithfulness, and all the other Fruits of the Spirit.
But can I expect those results without investing the time, patience, and effort it takes to teach those qualities?
The answer is no-but I still do.
I get frustrated when my 3 year old selfishly snatches toys out of his little sister’s hands. I’m annoyed because selfishness isn’t a quality I want him to have.
I mean, little Susie is the same age and is all too willing to share her toys.
But how much time have I really spent talking to him about sharing, kindness, and selflessness? Besides spatting out the all-too-frequent “Share your toys!” or “Stop snatching!”…not too much.
Yet I still expect him to do it and make me look good in front of other moms during playdates.
Or when I don’t spend enough quality time with my son over the course of a few days, and I notice a significant behavior change: more whining, defiant, bossy. Of course. His love tank is empty, and that’s how he’s expressing it. Yet part of me still expects him to “get over it” and act maturely (um, he’s 3….what?!) without having to do anything on my end….because “that’s how he’s supposed to act.”
There are no shortcuts.
Unrealistic expectations must be erased. Actions must be paired with words. Teaching, conversations, and time must take place.
It comes down to this: I can’t expect to get anything more than what I put in.
You reap what you sow.
And this year I hope to stop comparing, stop having unrealistic expectations for my kids (accompanied with lots of prayer…because it’s hard y’all!), and start sowing the heck out of those seeds I want to grow in my children.